Time: Wed Dec 10 06:46:46 1997
From: Paul Andrew Mitchell [address in tool bar]
Subject: SLS: Great Moments in Journalism
Cc: <pnpj@db1.cc.rochester.edu>
Bcc: sls, friends, liberty lists, 3cc, psc, Norm Vroman

a/k/a the "Yellow Bucket Awards"
soon to be announced for stellar
print corruptions in the state zone!

[We already know about the federal zone:]

We orchestrate the electrons, and you
peons get to crush the ink with your
stinky feet.  [Not a quote!]

/s/ Paul Mitchell,
Candidate for Congress

p.s.  Blinking sign seen atop 
L.A. Times Mirror building:

  (we already tried it, YUCK!)

>Some classic moments in journalism:
>Jon Snow:  "In a sense, Deng Xiaoping's death was inevitable, wasn't it?"
>Expert: "Er, yes."  (Channel 4 News)
>"As Phil De Glanville said, each game is unique, and this one is no
>different to any other." (John Sleightholme - BBC1)
>"If England are going to win this match, they're going to have to score a
>goal." (Jimmy Hill - BBC)
>"Beethoven, Kurtag, Charles Ives, Debussy - four very different names."
>(Presenter, BBC Proms, Radio 3)
>"Cystitis is a living death, it really is. Nobody ever talks about it, but
>if I was faced with a choice between having my arms removed and getting
>cystitis, I'd wave goodbye to my arms quite happily."
>(Louise Wener (of Sleeper) in Q Magazine)
>"Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
>(Metro Radio Sports Commentary)
>Listener: "My most embarrassing moment was when my artificial leg fell off
>at the altar on my wedding day."
>Simon Fanshawe: "How awful! Do you still have an artificial leg?"
>(Talk Radio)
>Interviewer: "So did you see which train crashed into which train first?"
>15-year-old: "No, they both ran into each other at the same time."
>(BBC Radio 4)
>Presenter (to palaeontologist): "So what would happen if you mated the
>woolly mammoth with, say, an elephant?"
>Expert: "Well in the same way that a horse and a donkey produce a mule, we'd
>get a sort of half-mammoth.
>Presenter: "So it'd be like some sort of hairy gorilla?"
>Expert: "Er, well yes, but elephant shaped, and with tusks." (GLR)
>Kilroy-Silk: "Did you mean to get pregnant?"
>Girl: "No. It was a cock-up."
>Grand National winning jockey Mick Fitzgerald: "Sex is an anti-climax after
>Desmond Lynam: "Well, you gave the horse a wonderful ride, everyone saw
>that." (BBC)

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