Time: Tue Oct 29 17:10:35 1996
To: marmstrong <marmstrong@snowcrest.net>
From: Paul Andrew Mitchell [address in tool bar]
Subject: more flirting, no hiding
Cc: 
Bcc: 

At 12:18 AM 10/29/96 -0800, you wrote:
>At 06:09 AM 10/27/96 -0800, you wrote:
>>
>>>>>Hi Paul:
>>>>>
>
>>I am not very experienced with net flirting,
>>but I am certainly open to trying.  Will you
>>guide me if I stumble?  Uncharted territory
>>for me, in some ways.  You sound as if you
>>have more experience in this department.
>
>I have tried (unsuccessfully) to "net flirt" twice.
>Part of the problem is that there is a lack of 
>intonation and kinetics to convey the emotional
>quality (lite, playful, dead serious, etc.)

That's part of the challenge.

 Part 
>of the problem is that I have learned to compartmentalize
>my persona.

How many compartments?
What are their names?
010010101010101010101010
"Now, Pobot, I, you stay
out of this, okay?"

Yes, Marcia, excuse us.
Please go on.

 For instance, if the topic is related to my 
>work, I lapse into a professional tone.

You need some variety.
Try mixing things up
a little bit.  Humor
can hop among all 
compartments, no?


 That doesn't
>seem to mesh with some male/female relationships.

I would be curious to know
what you could list among
the things that do so mesh ...
 
> 
>>I have not had a woman in my life for 10 years
>>now;  7 of those have been dedicated to law
>>research and activism.
>
>When my x and I divorced, I dated for about a year. 
>It created a tug of war in me concerning my loyalties
>to my children and my responsibilities to remain close 
>and in touch with them.

Only 28 hours in your day, right?


 I also decided that I was making
>repeat relationship mistakes.

This is a very important 
discovery.  Do you mind
sharing them with me?
This is a good way to
avoid them in the future.


 A friend told me to spend
>a few years with myself to establish who I was, rather than
>seeing myself as a reflection in another.

Your gender has a lot to do with
this tendency.  I would like to
learn more about these differences,
and how they affect our closest
relationships.


 I haven't dated
>since then. But then, I have become rather independent and 
>set in my ways. 

Not hardening of the categories,
I hope ...


>
>Then I decided that it  My stint at the investment
>>bank was just a money thing:  no heart, no passion,
>>just turn the crank, over and over.  I used to
>>be a very hot programmer on their line of 
>>minicomputers, but I lost touch with life when
>>computers started to consume my waking hours.
>
>In my last years at the insurance company, they 
>transfered the entire claims function to Denver. 
>Of 11 floors of people, only 3 were left. I could
>see the handwriting on the wall. Besides, I had 
>always wanted to be an at-home Mom. I was given 
>the (brief) opportunity to paint and to be at home
>for two years. I must admit, after a year, I was
>getting a bit bored and I had trouble getting used
>to depending on someone elses irregular income in 
>a seasonally based job. 
>
>>I am not Robert Redford, (snipped)
>
>Never much liked him. Liam Neeson and John Lithcough(?)
>are more my type.

I could pass for John's brother.
I don't always like his style.
I am more of a Dustin Hoffman fan;
versatility is something I admire.
In my dreams, I am Mel Gibson,
or Richard Gere (a little to 
conceited, however), or Clarence
Darrow.

 
>
>>I am so flattered to read these words.
>>How can I resist?  Answer:  I can't.
>>Here goes:
>>
>>I am 48, 
>
>(You must have skipped several grades in school. 
>By my recollection, I believe you were well into 
>college when I was still in High School. (You posted
>once about what years you were in college.)

Yes, 1967 thru 1970,
one year off to goof off,
then 1971 thru 1973, 
with added part-time credits
in an evening M.A. program,
which I never finished.

 
>
>(snipped) very fast fingers
>>(I type 140 wpm), 
>
>I type with three fingers on my right hand and two
>on my left ...and I peak. Once took a typing course
>and, although I really tried, I had to get up and
>walk out after a one hour lecture on setting margins.
>I also am a lousy speller and hate E-Mail because it 
>doesn't have a spell check. 

Eudora Pro 3.0 has a spell check.
It is getting rave reviews.


>
>(snipped) If I would find
>>time to exercise and diet a little better,
>>in no time, I would be back to racketball
>>and swimming, two of my athletic favorites.
>
>I am totally unathletic, but I do stretching
>exercises.

Do you like to hike, or take talks?
You must have absolutely beautiful
mountains around you.  How can you
resist?

 
>
>>Where you going on intuition, or did you have
>>other information to go on?  
>
>(See prior comment. As a reporter and a painter, I 
>am used to catching details. For instance, I know that
>Tom shares a birthdate with me from a notation he
>made on one of his forms.

This is an excellent quality,
but it might backfire with
people who don't want to be
scrutinized, like lines in 
a face, or idiosyncrasies.


 Besides, when I'm curious, I
>tend to pay closer attention.)

Me too.  I am paying close
attention to your every word
right now.

 Karnack says you are 
>probably of Polish ancestry. (Coloring, Catholic schools
>and the pseudonym - Moleski, wasn't it?)

Half Polish;  half Irish.


>
>>I have admired you from the first
>>day I set eyes on your typing.  :)
>>My mind's eye is seeing chocolate
>>swirls cascading over genuine smiles
>>that emanate from a deep well in your
>>soul.  Am I right?
>
>Sounds rather like a fountain.

Cascades of swirling curls ...


 (Actually, I
>squirm in response to romantic talk.)

That term has different
connotations.  You need
to elaborate here ...


 My hair
>is medium brown. (Confession, it is probably 
>mostly gray. Only Loreal knows for sure.)

When you close your eyes,
it feels the same, I bet.


>
>> Have Tarheel fax
>>the pic to a fax/modem, and convert
>>to .BMP, so we can share it.  I'll have
>>to find a recent photo;  I don't have
>>many photos of me.  Too shy about pix.
>
>I also am camera shy. The pics about four
>years old, when I had long hair to the middle 
>of my back.

It must be beautiful.
Was it hard to care for?


 Haven't heard much from tarheel
>in the past month. (We never did correspond 
>consitently on a personal level.)

I am not getting very close
to anyone on LLAW;  maybe 
it's the medium:  too many spies.


>
>>I am a good writer, having done it 
>>most of my life now.  The nuns in 
>>parochial school would not let us go
>>home until everything was perfect.
>>I had no idea what I would ever do
>>with all that grammar and spelling.
>>Now I appreciate what a great English
>>education I had, on top of the rest
>>of high school and college.  I was
>>fortunate, for sure, to have had
>>such good teachers.  We must be good
>>teachers, Marcia;  it is very important.
>>
>And so, you are also an artist?
>>That means you have a heart for
>>beauty and fine things, yes?
>
>My mother was a commercial artist before 
>I was born. It is a talent that I inherited
>naturally.

But it must also be developed,
like a rough diamond.

 My son also has the "gift" and 
>has done the most amazing illustrations 
>since he was old enough to hold a pencil. 

He and I would get along
just great.  I love to
admire the creativity of
children.  They so much
enjoy the attention, 
especially when it is genuine.


>
>One of the reasons I was drawn to this area
>was its beauty. (Where I live is a series 
>of pocket-valleys surrounded by Alp-like 
>mountains.)

That's what I thought.


 Another reason was the seasons. 
>(I grew up in early life near Chicago and had 
>forgotten how I missed the turning leaves and snow.)

I know.  Cities really get me down.


>
>I also grew up with an appreciation for the finer 
>things. My family was upper middle-class and we
>had nice things and visited museums and galleries and 
>went to plays.

You can still do that, 
with a high-speed modem
and a good phone line.

 
>  
>>You sound very very accomplished.
>>You certainly have my attention now.
>
>I also weave; have won first place ribbons for 
>knitting, sewing and raspberry jam.

Did you weave the jam into 
the sweaters?

 
>
>>Your brain puts you in the top
>>one percent, IQ-wise, yes?
>>It shows in your command of
>>law and research.  
>
>Spent most of my youth either up in a tree or with my 
>head in a book. IQ was measured at 138 when I was
>a teenager.

Those tests were skewed,
so children would not get
big heads over their scores.
The standard measurements
are riddled with methodological
problems.  They measure what
they measure;  that's all.

 It enabled me to convince adults to let me 
>finish High School in 3 years. I believe it's 
>border-line MENSA, but I am sure it's slipped many many
>points since then.

I was invited in once myself,
but I was terrified of failing.  :)

 
>
>I *know* yours is way, way up there. You exhaust 
>me with you ability to field all topics on the list,
>seemingly off the top of your head. And, you are
>so productive in your work. (Were you hyperactive as
>a child? I can't keep up with you.)

There were some very painful
experiences in my childhood,
which were formative, I am afraid.
Much of it came together only 
in recent months:  losing my
emotionally distant brother 
to alcohol, and realizing my
own poisoning by it, put me on
a track which terminated at 
Trust #62 in Puerto Rico, aka
Internal Revenue Service.  
My Petition to Congress re: the
Volstad (Volstead?) Act was an
immensely lonely and immensely
powerful insight, no doubt greatly
assisted by the Holy Spirit.  Even
the incredulous agreed with the
thesis, after they looked at the
evidence.  You need to know that
I am on a mission to dismantle the
IRS, and I am now half-way there.
The Lord is waiting to reward me
for a service well done, after
floundering for so many decades.
This is my Redemption, for Me,
for you, and for the country --
everyone.


>
>(snipped - blush, blush)

I could feel it all the way over here.

>
>>Try calling the vendor to see
>>if they can diagnose it for
>>you over the phone. 
>
>Dennis at the server says it is probably 
>a noisy line. I believe netscape is also talking
>to the server to see if they can speed up that
>download before it disconnects on me.
>
>Maybe they can dial in and do remote testing.
>>Also, try getting their recommended
>>software.  Finally, check the UART
>>using MSD (UART = Universal Asynchronous
>>Receiver Transmitter).  It must be
>>a model 16550, which is required for
>>the high speed.  Is it internal or
>>external?
>
>Huh? Are you speaking English? My modems are
>internal, if that's what your asking and it 
>uses TddY(?) to correspond with the server. The
>server did provide TCPMan with my work computer, but 
>no dialer with my Windows 95 enrollment software.

No.  Go to the DOS directory,
and execute MSD.  Then check
out your serial ports (COM1,
COM2, COM3, COM4).  The "UART"
should be 16550; if not, you
need to change your hardware,
preferably with a SIIG I/O board,
which has the faster parts.
UART is the heart of serial 
Input/Output ("I/O").  It stands for
Universal Asynchronous Receiver
Transmitter.  Serial comm is
always asynchronous.  Input is
"reception" and output is 
"transmission."  The part is
"Universal" because all phone
systems utilize it.


>
>>I can send you some diagnostic
>>software, but you must keep it
>>to yourself.  It is good, and
>>the owners deserve to be paid 
>>for it.
>>
>I probably wouldn't know how to use it. I am a 
>computer dummy. I also can't fix cars
>>>
>>I usually begin by wiping the entire directory,
>>and reinstalling.  Eudora's mail files should
>>be saved first:  IN.MBX, IN.TOC, OUT.MBX, OUT.TOC,
>>and TRASH.MBX and TRASH.TOC.  "TOC" is table of
>>contents, an index pointer file.
>>
>Sounds nasty to me. 
>>>  
>>Go to 16 MB minimum;   32 is better. (snipped)
>>
>Thanks. I hope my parents are generous.

RAM is the single most important
reason why systems start faltering,
and it's very cheap now-a-days.
We paid $45,000 for one megabyte
in 1979.

>
>>Sounds like a third-world country.  :))
>
>No. We just haven't fully entered into the 
>twentieth century in many ways. (Do you like 
>science fiction? I once read a book called the 
>Santaroga barrier about a group of people
>connected as a culture by fungal ingestion 
>through their cheese. It reminds me of here. 
>Most of the population is descendant from the 
>original miners and settlers of the 1850s. If 
>you weren't born here, you will always be a 
>newcomer.

I'll remember that if I ever visit.

 When my daughter's current roomate was
>back in High School, she complained that she couldn't
>find any dates - she was related to all the boys in 
>the school!)

So, what did she do?


> 
>>You might do better with a satellite
>>down-link, but that is beaucoup bucks.
>>You have lots of different points of
>>failure;  this makes for management
>>headaches.  Can you lease a dedicated
>>line into Redding, with conditioning?
>>You need to know to ask for these
>>things, or the phone company will give
>>you their cheapest, noisest wires.
>>Modem comm requires better fidelity
>>than the telephone.  People can tolerate
>>a lot of static, before they start to
>>complain.  Modems just slow down until
>>they halt.  
>
>Geese Paul, I only take home $12M per year
>and we have to live on something.

The Internet is our leverage
into the next millennium.


> 
>Give a call to the phone 
>>company, and just talk it over with them,
>>without sounding like a whiner.  See if
>>they can come up with a solution to 
>>the problems you are having.  You MUST
>>get a clean line to your server;  that
>>is a must -- NUMERO UNO.
>
>Next time I pass Tom McCulley's phone truck on 
>the way into work I'll stop him and ask. 

I figured you would know him
by name.  I have learned tons
from the phone installers.
They love it when a customer
talks turkey with them.


>>>
>>>I have gotten it to work, but I really
>want to use Netscape.
>>
>>Yes, it is clearly superior.
>>Have you seen the "Official
>>Netscape Nevigator 3.0 Book"?
>>It is magnificent, and very
>>well written, for beginners
>>and experts too.  It also comes
>>with a CD-ROM with Version 3.0.
>
>Nope, but I'll look for it. Just got 
>"Running a Perfect Web Site" and will
>try to wade through that in between
>watershed studies, salmon surveys, and 
>technical reports on non-point source pollution
>and river morphology.

Your mind is semi-ubiquitous.

 
>
>>It's the kind of book you want
>>to leave on your coffee table.
>>Can you believe how vast the
>>Internet is?  It just blows my
>>mind that this dream has become
>>a reality during our lifetimes.
>>We used to fantasize about this
>>kind of thing, 20 years ago,
>>while we sat around debugging
>>our Fortran programs. 
>
>It is exciting for a researcher. Also kind of 
>reminds me of the CB in the 1970s.

Citizen's Band?
 
> 
>>I love to sit down at a 17" monitor
>>with 10-year-old kids, and 
>>explore "rockets" and "distant
>>galaxy cluster" with them.  
>>They jump right beyond the medium,
>>and get right into the message.
>>One child I know has a serious 
>>vision problem, but he was able
>>to see everthing if we got him
>>up close to the screen.  Once
>>he mastered the mouse (about 10
>>minutes of trial-and-error), he
>>ended up surfing the web for
>>4 hours;  we had to tear him
>>away from the screen.  Everyone
>>had so much fun.
>
>When my kids were little, I read to them 
>every night. By the second grade, I discovered 
>that my son definitely had trouble reading. I 
>had his eyes and hearing tested and then demanded 
>that the school do testing. He was diagnosed with 
>what they call a "processing disorder."

Are you sure it is not
dyslexia?

 He has a high 
>IQ, but he lacks the usual facility for internal 
>organization.

sounds like dyslexia to me.

 (It's like a file drawer where the 
>information is not stored by alphabetical filing. 
>Instead, he organizes by pictures.)

But he also has a vision problem, 
yes, so his brain has to fill in
the big gaps which flow in between
the images his visual cortex receives.

 He was unable to 
>learn reading by phonetics, and struggles along.

Sure, because he could not
see the words the way they
were printed on the page.


 I let
>him experiment a lot when he was little. (There was always
>something going on in the sink in the downstairs bathroom, 
>which became "HIS" bathroom.)

trial and error is still my
most powerful diagnostic tool

 Got him small engines at 
>flea markets to take a part.

How did he do with this task?


 I am hoping the interactive 
>and graphic nature of the internet will help him to receive 
>educational information that he would not get through standard
>academic means.

You are dealing with a neural disorder
here;  he will struggle with the
Internet, because he cannot organize
visual information in his mind.
I would experiment with crystal clear
verbal descriptions of concepts, 
like geometry (points, lines, areas),
and then let him find these objects
in the things he sees.  From there,
you can build up.  This will begin
to retrain his brain, and he will
be able to adjust, if not overcome,
his disability.

 (We turn the graphics facility on for his 
>net adventures and off for mine.)

Get some geometry games
and learning tools for 
your PC, and see what he
does.  Sit next to him
and let him describe to
you what he is seeing.
Don't impose your vision
on his;  he is not seeing
the same things as you,
so you must trust him to
tell you what is appearing
on his retina and in his
visual cortex.  This exercise
will give him the confidence
to decode his own disability, 
once your feedback begins to
be understood.  Narrow the 
gap, slowly at first.  Try it
and let me know what happens.


>

>
>After four years, I just convinced my Board
>to grant me a $2m/yr. raise. After new deductions
>were figured, I ended up with $5 per week additional
>take-home pay and appear to have lost my Earned Income 
>status. I can imagine what my children's life will
>be like and, without intervention now by our 
>generation, I can see no out for them from debt except
>to wipe the slate clean from the old government and 
>begin again, anew. That scares me - particularly with 
>a teen age son who could likely end up a casualty.
>
>   Janet Reno made a serious
>>strategic error when she underestimated me.
>>Anyway, more later, ok?  
>
>I would love
>>to meet you some day.  Is there a train
>>between Tucson and Redding? 
>
>It would be nice to meet someday. Believe Amtrak
>runs up to Oregon through here. Mt. Shasta is
>an old railroad town and Montague was 
>a cattle shipping spot. Train may still stop in 
>Mt. Shasta. 
>
>> I love
>>trains;  built a huge model railroad
>>when I was 15, from ground up. 
>
>I got the kids a German markel and made a minature
>landscape on plywood with farms and mountains, trees,
>horses and lots of model cars. They never got into 
>it, but I enjoyed designing and creating it.

I would STILL enjoy it,
believe it or not.


>
>>My big downfall was too much speed --
>>lots of derailings.  I still drive
>>too fast (but I maintain the car to
>>do so safely).
>
>I have a truck. My daughter rolled it on the ice last
>winter. She was OK, but I went with plastic over the 
>side window for about three months till it was fixed.

Thank God for the big favors, yes?
  
>>
>>Bye for now.
>>>>/s/ Paul Mitchell

my edit buffer is now full.  Bye.
      


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